I hope you find it's not quite so sudden/drastic as that, going from the old way to the new; I think it's more ebb and flow and not as "dreary" as your description sounds to me :-)

Don't "worry" about termination yet either; it won't come until you're ready for it. You remind me of my stepson who, when his father turned 50 asked him, "What does it feel like to be 50???" and then the same thing when he turned 60, etc. It's not the same "anticipating" as actually being there. I'll never forget, back in about 1977-78 when I started therapy with my therapist how I could not even begin to imagine being symptom free of some of my symptoms, just couldn't imagine what I'd "do"/be like without them, etc. and then it got to 2005 and the end of therapy and I'm symptom-free (of those particular symptoms I was worried about :-) and I have trouble remembering what it was like in 1977. LOL.