It souds as if you are expecting too much of yourself ad too quickly. BP is a MAJOR big deal and it will take some time to get the hang of it. I also suggest therepy and many metal health facilities offer a sliding scale.

Your wife, while coping with her own severe problems, needs to give you some time and space. You both need to educate yourselves about this disorder-the library is your friend.

Contratulations on sticking with your sobriety. That you are not allowing your disorder to push you back into the bottle is admirable and you need to give yourself credit for that. Your control is exceptional.

Keep coming back here and you will learn techniques for coping and you will find great support from all of us that suffer right along with you.

And perhaps you should ask your wife not to be so hard on you. It sounds as if you are really trying to please her-that should be enough and she needs to can the attitude.

All the best.