Thanks Biiv, that means a great deal to me! I have so many more questions I've asked my T, and I just haven't posted them all here. I wrote that 4 page email and it was intense. I'd always be happy to send you any I've written to her if you ever want them......even though our situations may differ, I sent some pretty long and intense discussions with her and it helped me put words to feelings I couldn't do in therapy. It strengthened our bond as she went paragraph by paragraph in therapy and encouraged me to face her and hear her replies.
You may find them helpful if you feel ashamed about what things you want to know or feel from your t. At least to know I felt (and feel sometimes) the same way about the dyad and how we connect. Anyway, if you ever want the inner-most workings of my twisted little mind, PM me and I'd be happy to share.......or hear yours as well........

((((((((((((((Biiv)))))))))))))))))))))) you can grow by leaps and bounds when you push that comfort zone between you and T.