Ahhhhhhhhh yes, I know that feeling and where you are at with T. It's ok, maybe you're not ready yet to say these things to your T. Just know, if you ever need/want to, your T may need you to need him..............just a bit as that is what a big fear for you may be.....just food for thought, you reaching out to T for help is often a very necessary thing...

Take care!