It might not be "completely" your fault but you are responsible for your own actions. I do believe an apology is in order but in a respectful letter sent to her business address. She is not required to accept your apology and if she does, it doesn't mean she can magically handle your aggressive behavior.

I'd consider finding a therapist that specializes in anger issues and my aggression would be the topic in our first meeting. If he/she doesn't want to deal with it then maybe they can recommend someone.

Best of luck!