Thank you, Angst Lady

Part of why I let him do his crap is bc I used to make a good salary and now I'm on disability. It just seems like a way I can contribute in a non financial sense. I have put him through quite a bit with my past break downs and addiction. But as I get my meds sorted and gain more sobriety I'm finding my voice so to speak. Also, my self esteem is on the low end after gaining a ton of weight on anti psychotic meds. It's something I notice all the time with people. As a person who has been thin and obese it's mind boggling the difference in respect. I feel the need to not make demands which is BS, but I catch myself falling into that role with help from society.

The funny thing is that when my husband does clean the kitchen I go behind him and re clean to my standards. Like I have different sponges for dishes and counter tops OCD type things that he'd never follow. I've never seen anyone put my effort into making dishes germ free. We have different coffee mugs, water glasses, hand towels even laundry detergent lol. That helps me sleep at night. But you have a very good point, and I should be more assertive. I have gotten better on cooking as in I'm no longer a short order cook to meet his nightly request. And it's leftovers or take your happy *** to Dennys.

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