I totally get not wanting to tell them. I was the same way, I still am, actually. It sucks when you have parents you can't talk. Your situation is extremely similar to mine when I was your age, so I get it. I don't know if you'd want to do this, but you could call the health department and explain to someone in the mental health unit your situation - you need a counselor but don't have the money to pay for it - and see if they can help. I hope something works out for you. Take care of yourself! You matter.