Thank you lil_bit, but the thing is, it is controlling me. It has for years and years. I think I have figured out what's keeping it active -- but I don't know how to put all of it behind me. I am having great difficulty "working through" the stuff. I'm afraid that my body is ruined. It can take a lot, but.............I have really messed myself up. And I only have myself to blame. How pathetic.

PM me any time.

Hugs,

Desy