hi jinny
not said much about my own fight with depression, as i have been more worried about hubby, i to suffer , i first was given meds when i wasnt with dec,i was in a failing relationship and struggling to find help with my eldest daughter,
after a sort of strange childhood brought up by my dad and his sisters and brothers help, i got hurt by cousins they used to bully me and as we got older female cousin just started being a normal teenager only being a year older i think that as me and my brothers were quite often made to stay at this relations house we were intruding on there family life and they found it hard to cope, but the boy who was two years older than me became creepy, he started watching me change i didnt know at first untill i caught him but he made threats to me he would come into the bathroom or into the room i slept in this went on for about three years i actually used to get migrains worrying about how i could get out going to this relations but i couldnt stop this untill i turned sixteen and i had a boyfriend, we went to vist boyfriends friends and i never went home but dad got the police to bring me home i refused untill boyfriend explained to the police, it was all dealt with i dont know what was said or who said what i had to stay at another relations untill it had all been sorted, there is more but i have left this out, since that first time of being medicated i have since been medicated three more times differant meds each time, like you i tried prozac and many diferant ones, in 2005 i started getting bad again i even know now some of the time when im getting depressed, and went to the docs she was very good she put me back on a new med in the range that works for me i still have two side efects i have to deal with, i was still struggling when my marriage began to fail and then i did the unthinkable one morning after i got home from work and having a conversation with hubby i went out in my car at first just for a ride, and yes thats were they found me, the only person i asked for was my aunt the mother of the cousin who had abused me, and she came to be with me while i was in hospital, i had to see the hospital cpn before they would release me and i had to promise not to do it again, i still am promising not to do it again for the sake of my children, because i hurt them that day as well as myself, i never got put in touch with the mental health team because i promised my doctor i wouldnt do it again and started councilling , i never talked about what had happened in my childhood, but i started to get better it wasnt untill i strarted to go to a diferant councillor and all our housing problems started that i disclosed my abuse to my doctor, after advice from her and people here i told my new councillour about it, i have been around hubbys cpn especially when she told him that she wasnt sure he was actually depressed and she said simmiler about me
so i found the help i needed at my local doctors so please dont give up hope we are listning and i hope that your doctor finds the right person to help you