Yes, it’s a stance many therapists take. To help a client grown up developmentally (in a way they didn’t manage during childhood and adolescence), it is often accepted that the client will depend on the therapist’s support to some degree, until they are healthy and able to separate (like a child leaving home).

I’m not sure if I follow you, but it sounds like your therapist offered something (meeting healthy dependency needs), but you were afraid to accept that because you didn’t know it could be healthy? Do you think you could have accepted that there can be healthy forms of dependency if she’d told you earlier in the relationship?

It sounds like your therapist apologised for something that may have been a mistake in your case, but you refused to accept the apology and intimidated her instead. I do think that it’s really unfortunate that your therapist ended so abruptly without offering any assistance through the transition.

I wouldn’t personally feel particularly intimidated by someone hitting an object like a table in front of me, but clearly your therapist did. I would be annoyed by someone trying to intimidate me into behaving in a particular way. I would also not respond to anything along the lines of ultimatums or time limits.

Based on what you've said, it's pretty difficult to tell if your therapist was the best fit for you, or if it would have been best if you'd been referred to someone else earlier on.