Tiodlliwi,

I know how you feel. I swear my mom doesn't even know my phone number. Most of our contact is on my effort. But I love her company and I'm trying to set a good example for my kids. I hope I don't fall in her same foot steps when my kids get older.
I'm going to give you the same advise I give my kids - You can't always do what you want to do; sometimes you have to do what is right (If it is with in your means). When attending family events I dread going, but when it's over I end up having a great time. From your post it seems like you spent alot of time with your family when you were little and it is wonderful to share those good memories with them. I love for my kids to hear those memories too.
I wish you the best as you make this decision.

I know God only gives me what I can handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much. - Mother Theresa