Sorry for mass quote post, and sorry to any that I've missed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by StbGuy
I know I'm a bit weird, but also for me something that is therapeutic is putting together something that is broken, or cleaning something small when it is dirty. Not so much work that it is overwhelming, but just little enough that you would want to do it. For me, when I clean something up or fix it, the challenge I set myself is not to "clean" or "fix" it, but how much can I restore it to its former glory, or even, can I even perhaps exceed its former glory? When I do get it right, it's extremely satisfying  . Just something silly I do to prevent myself from going completely insane sometimes. |
I think it's fantastic that you have the practical skills and motivation to do so! I am not very practical minded I must be honest, that is very much the wife's area of expertise... and she's essentially banned me from trying to fix electrical devises (I'm colour blind and have blown fuses before
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My challenge is my writing... but it's sporadic due to motivation and or periods where I really struggle with concentration.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheOriginalMe
Your dad sounds like he was pretty shrewd and a great person to have around. I'm sorry that he is no longer with you.
Here's some more imagery for you to ponder, maybe it will distract you for a minute or too.
My blue tits got fed caterpillars again today and the blackbirds got diced slug. I can't work out whether my wanton cruelty to invertebrates will cancel out all the good karma from my kindness to garden birds, perhaps that is why my progress is always one step forward one step back?
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Well, I suppose you could look at it as protecting your garden... plants are very much at the mercy of such critters and you are their champion... hopefully that's not fuzzy logic
Quote:
Originally Posted by waterknob1234
I feel the same way as you sometimes. I question why I am still here. I get angry at myself thinking if only I was smarter, if only I finished college things would be better. I have thought of ending it and always find reasons not to. I agree with Useless Me that in some way God has a beautiful plan for all of us, we just can't see it now. It's also hard in that others don't understand our pain and anguish. Please don't feel guilty about posting your problems or consider it "whining." Post away and vent. We love you and we understand.   |
Will get to Useless me below. Having achieved education has not in my case made things better... I got my degree... but have been unable to do anything with it. Anxiety, confusion and an erratic memory rendered me (in my eyes) incompetent... and that boat has long sailed
Thank you for your kind words at the end... I acknowledge that this is an amazing community... and that I do bully myself into believing that my problems and words are pathetic.
I want so much to be able to help others... yet here I am crying out and looking for help
Quote:
Originally Posted by Useless Me
Toe,
Your post will be something that many of us can relate to. I think a lot of us will question "what is the point".
Personally - I think God has a plan and we often have no idea what it is. I also know that some here are not follower of God.... so what should they hang on to? I am not sure then. Family, friends, kids. Volunteering and helping out others so when you leave - the world remembers you for a sliver of time.
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I envy those (you) who believe... who have faith... who have that as a type of anchor that helps towards giving meaning, giving reason.
It's hard to explain from an atheists point of view... it is not for lack of wanting to believe in a god, I really wish I did.... just something inside me that doesn't. I will only find out if I was wrong on death I guess... it's all a bit weird for me to talk about.
Quote:
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And as for the whining. BOY can I relate to that statement. I am pretty much sick of listening to myself whine (I would think my wife wants to puke over it)... But, my therapist would say it is not whining - it is evidence of how much pain we are in. You can not see our pain as if we broke a bone... Even cancer patients can see the problem on an x-ray (not to belittle such an awful illness). So here we sit with our invisible pain...... and I do not think the world can understand it
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This I very much relate to. I think this is part of why I despise the weakness myself... it is not seen, is not tangible.... others look at you like you're gone out... and this leads me to wondering if in fact I am gone out... if it is actually a thing rather than just some damn fabrication that I'm caught up in the middle of.
Quote:
Originally Posted by healingme4me
Anniversaries amp it all up.
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Yeah, they do :s Should have seen it coming and tried to ready myself for it... to try and find some way to keep balance... but I didn't and it hit me like a ton of bricks.
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Independent Mental Health Advocate (IMHA): UK