I know things suck right now but I'm reminded of when I was a teenager---people were exceedingly mean to me at school, I had no friends etc but that just made me work harder because I was going to show them what I could become and how stupid they were to ever doubt me. It's not the most positive approach but once I did get to a point where I was successful I didn't think negatively toward these people at all. I could have never predicted where I would end up today though---I mean I've got a PhD....nobody in my family even finished college. Right now you're in the struggle part of things but who knows where you could be in ten years? What do you want to do? Set a goal and start working toward it. You mentioned school...obviously that's something you still want to do....so what do you need to get there? You need to be stable to some extent, going to the hospital is not great if you have an exam to be at...so set that as goal one----get to a point where you are taking your meds in whatever form is optimal for you get stable for like 6 months or so and then apply to school again...What do you want to do socially. I know its hard because you are so rural but you mentioned a starbucks....perhaps you could meet some fun people there? You mentioned before wanting to volunteer...that's another social thing. It is far to soon to give up...things might not be optimal now but you have to work hard and build them to get where you want to go and you will get there...