Well, first of all, Kala, I would think you might just sit down with your SO & tell him essentially what you've written here. Communication is the most important part of any relationship. So if the two of you are going to be together for the long haul, the sooner you learn to communicate your needs, wants, & fears the better. If you find that you simply can't do this on your own, then perhaps some couples counseling might be in order. Perhaps you can learn to respect your SO's need to be old fashioned, & he can learn to respect your need to do things for yourself & your ability to , in fact, do things that in the past he thought of as "man's work." Give-&-take is an absolute necessity in a relationship. Good Luck!