I feel really confused and lost right now. I've always thought my parents were really abusive, and I have intense anxiety around them. I also have bad social anxiety and I've always blamed it on them. Because I'm so scared of them, I keep distant and stay in my room all day because I hate being around them. The thing is, their side of the story is completely opposite, and they think they're great parents and I'm the one who's mean. I have a ten year old brother (I'm 16), and he doesn't have any problem with them but they've always been nicer to him. They say mean things to him too, but he doesn't seem to notice and he thinks it's normal or something.
Lately, my parents are convinced that I'm mentally ill, and they say that's why I think they're abusive. I'm really scared now that perhaps they're right and there's something wrong with me (besides intense anxiety). If I found out I was autistic or something, I would probably kill myself.

Do you think I could really be delusional and they're not abusive? I'm really scared right now. I don't want to be mentally ill and live in a mental home. If so what could it be and what can I do?

I do love my parents a lot, but I have a hard time showing that.