big changes start tomorrow, and I'm feeling very lost. I want to both hide and seek support. I want to go sit in my therapist's office, even if it's just to sit while she does other things. I don't know where to turn. I feel like a little kid just needing to be near someone not involved in the day-to-day and the changes, but really needing proximity. I feel totally alone, though I am surrounded by caring people...
sorry. I got distracted writing to my therapist, and lost my train of thought here. I still feel very alone, and very needy, but I'm better at distracting from that in this moment. I think writing to my T helped, even though I won't get to talk to her about it for another 3 weeks... I hate change, and I hate feeling soley like the construct of someone else's imagination. I have no real sense of self at the moment, and it's underscored by the changes about to happen. I'm afraid if I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind, and I will simply blink out of existence... So if I'm not back here, my fears are accurate, and I was just someone's imaginary friend