I'm sorry you're in such pain. I get help from talking to a friend or professional when I'm feeling that way. Maybe by talking it out you can see if your deep feelings of rejection are based in reality or was it an over-reaction in fear of rejection? Sometimes the truth can be in the middle. Remember that putting your well being in the hands of others is a no win situation for you. In the fellowship of AA we have a saying that if we place our emotional, spiritual and physical dependence on God, we will always be taken care of. I hope this helps a little.
Watch a funny show so you laugh out loud. Seriously, it's great for your health....not to mention you need to keep those smile muscles in shape!
Hugs and happy thoughts coming your way.
Anniego