Thanks for your suggestions and words of help.
I've been in so many meds since the age 18 until now, I'm 41. It seems that my character changed in 1999/2000. I have done things that I would have never done before. It's very crazy. I have a 6 1/2 yr old daughter and I cant stop thinking what would happen if I stop feeling love for my daughter... its an awful thought. I can go on feeling lonely and empty but i cant with out the love for my daughter.