Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0
When I want to deal alone, I tell him I need alone time, and he backs off. When I just want to be held, I communicate that too. But as for what's going on in my head? I rarely tell him unless it affects him in some way.
Granted, we will probably need to adjust this strategy once we're living together, but for now it works for both of us.
|
Great advice. I learned this after trial and error, and apply a similar strategy to friends and family. Previously, I used to feel that people could save me, and that oversharing was a marker of closeness. Now I know that it isn't true, and there's a lot that I can deal with by myself.
This doesn't make my relationships any less close -- rather, without the codependency I used to create, my relationships are stronger.