HI. I used to use this forum back in 2006 and it really helped so much. Got me through a very difficult period of time. Then, lost track of why I stopped posting but now I'm back. I'm having a flare up of what I think is either depersonalization disorder or a dissociative disorder (not DID).

I remember hitting some deep buried memories in therapy about a month ago, feeling like it was way too much and that the feelings would "kill me" or destroy me, and WHAM, a few days later I was waking up and experiencing this fragmented/split feeling inside me. It's been going on for 3+ weeks now. It varies in degrees. It's a cycle where anxiety makes it worse and it also causes anxiety. It's horrible! the sensations in my head and physical symptoms only enhance the horrible feelings of detachment and death that I have to live with on a day to day basis.

does anyone know what I'm talking about?

I just finished reading "Feeling Unreal" and thank God for that book. It was written in 2006 I think but I just found it now and I'm so grateful that there ARE others out there who get this, I just never knew that and have suffered alone for the past 24 years with this thing rising and lowering in intensity depending on various life events.

I am a 46 yo female and it there is anyone out there who would be willing to connect with me over this I would appreciate that very much! I have felt like I'm suffered alone with this for 20+ years and it's been a lonely, isolating path.

Thanks for listening and Hope everyone is hanging in there.

Susan
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