Quote:
Originally Posted by ladybugparkway
Hi there
I am an older more mature female. I need a closeness with my significant other which I just can't get from him. He tends to want to make all the decisions from purchasing a simple lamp to the date & everything's bout contacting the minister to marry us which is 2 weeks away and hasn't been done.
When I make casual comments regarding stopping at a consignment store to look at furniture items for the home we just purchased, his comment today while driving was......we don't need any. But 400 feet down the toad he decides to stope at a day old bakery and just pulls in.
This is a daily routine with degrading comments such as: I should have stayed on the road traveling for work.
It hurts me as I am only there for 'something'. I don't feel important anymore before we became engaged.
I don't want to hurt his feelings but I feel as if I really don't want to marry him.
We don't laugh. He drives me everywhere which is nice but I never have any time for me except when he travels. I must be honest in saying I am happier when he is traveling.
I believe he means well. I notice he is quick to anger. I don't know if it is because he takes so many pain pills for a disease call angelosis spondylitis.
I don't believe we have a good relationship at all to even consider marriage.
I just don't know what to do financially, spiritually & more. He tells me if I go to our church for counseling he will leave the church.
Thanks for any help you can point me towards.
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i see red flag after red flag...you are having many problems already.
these problems will only multiply if you tie the knot.
are you willing to put up with this type of behavior for the rest of your life?
i imagine not....he is inconsiderate of your feelings and is minimizing you.
you do not deserve to be treated in this fashion..no one does.
if the disease is the same as spondylolysis ( one of my ex's had it..well she still does she ended up getting a spinal fusion) or similar he will be in excruciating pain & she was not pleasant to be around she was angry and drank all the time.
she used to be really mean to me but i stayed by her side till the surgery..i don't know if this is similar but it sounds similar, she told me before the surgery nothing would help the pain.
not making excuses for him..but i would hold off on the wedding until these issues were resolved, it looks like if you dive in now..you are really going to be sorry..hope this helps
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I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!
