First of all, I am so sorry that you're having that experience. Now, please know: You are not alone. I have had such thoughts repeatedly throughout my life. It's anxiety, probably more specifically symptomatic of OCD. An example: from the time I was 8 years old I KNEW I was going to die in my 17th year. No idea where I got the idea, but it haunted me to the point at which I'd become physically ill. I KNEW I would die in my 17th year. I had almost no doubt. WELL. Turned out that my 17th year was one of the best, most productive, and fun years of my life. btw, I'm 51 now

So, throughout the years I've had similar repetitive thoughts. It's a miserable feeling. Good for you for having scheduled the therapy appointment. I have found Seroquel to be helpful with the severity of those frightening thoughts that stick in my mind.