There is no double standard. I would not agree with her taking their marital problems out of the relationship and opening her legs for someone she got better attention from.

For the record, I haven't got 3 kids and a bloke that sleeps around

Yeah, I agree. For all the people on here that has had to suffer their bloke shagging around-sit down, as this time it is different because he is 'reaching out' for people to tell him it's alright to have done what he did lol

Infact, don't look back ...oh wait as you are back in touch with the affair behind your wife's back - you haven't! I say, knock out a few more kids with the next one and when you are not happy, find someone else to have an affair with and then come back here and we will all tell you that is alright too!

I played devils advocate as no one else was and they all thought it was alright to talk in a derogatory way about the women he was going to leave and shift the blame to her for that, instead of asking why his wife is such a mess and what role he has played in that, he simply claimed he wasn't that bad-nice, loving, committed. It is actually ignorant not to see that, but I suppose that is what ignorance is.

But you sound like you'd really love a partner as good and open as OP. I hope you get yourself one!