There was once it became an issue for me but it came well after the fact. When I was angry about a couple of my coworkers who had mothers who are very involved (full time free babysitters, buy a lot of the kids clothing, see their kids a lot) yet the coworkers talk so negatively about those parents. I was angry because my mom died young and my kids never got to know her. I also said that I was mad because people choose to shut their mothers out. She said something like not everybody has a good healthy mother. Sometimes that relationship is toxic. I kind of nastily said well I would take my mother any way at this point but I don't get a choice. Fast forward a couple of months and I found out her mother is still very much alive but they have no contact as her mother because her mother is toxic for her...oops

PS this board also made me realize how unhealthy the mother/child relationship can be.