I know what its like to hate your job and know that you have to stay in it! Its easy for others to say "quit" but its hard to actually do. Especially for someone like me (and maybe you) who doesn't want to let others down and feels guilty "giving up" on something. Im worried quitting my job would lead to even lower self esteem. I was on Citalipram for 8 years. Its started doing the opposite after awhile, making me more tired and anhedonic. I slowly tapered myself off and am trying to adjust to the chemicals getting out of my system. One over the counter supplement that really helps is SAMe. Its a mood enhancement and I can tell a difference when I don't take it, but its not as strong as a prescribed antidepressant. I live in a small town, but I found it at Walmart, and Im sure you can find it online.