Ok, I am glad you got a chance to vent that pocket of anger then, it's important to be able to have a place to do that too.

Don't give up on love? Well, it is important to understand that if you come across a toxic person as you have described and that person is not willing to get help for their "problems" and the way they "abuse others", then all the love in the world can't help that person. You can see that person's damage sometimes, but that doesn't mean that because you see it, it is your job to try in "fix" it somehow. You can sound an alarm, or try to seek justice, but often someone who is toxic to others is just not interested in being "helped or fixed". Some people genuinely don't have the capacity to empathize and often that can be how their brain is, which is not something "you" can change.

The only thing you can do is learn how you became the victim and how you can identify danger signs earlier so you can change whatever way you might attract these abusive individuals.

Allowing yourself to decide that an abuser is not all that bad is really not productive for you either. Sometimes a person is abusive because they have an issue that they don't understand "yes" I have addressed that with my husband's alcoholism. But it was a long hard road for me before I finally got to see the core issues that led him down that road. And, there are things he does that are hard on me that are a part of his disorder too. I have a hard time with that because it tends to trigger and intrude on my own way of thriving etc.

You can't know "everything" about people, each person is an experience that we learn from and we don't always see the red flags where that person might be unhealthy for us in some way either. The most important person you need to forgive and continue to "love" is yourself which is what a lot of people fail to do, or know how to do. You have the right to be angry and vent if you need to, also to be validated and comforted to where you can let go and love "self" again and keep moving forward in your life to where you continue to learn healthier ways to help yourself/ protect yourself and keep exploring this thing we call "life".

OE