I agree with Useless Me: I don't and didn't do illegal drugs but after my break up, I did drink more than I used to...thinking it would dull the pain. It did, but the next day's anxiety and depression (I don't have traditional hangovers) were killer...literally. I just wanted to die, crawl in a hole and pull it in after me. Self medicating is never a good thing....even if you tell yourself it's just temporary.

That said, I so totally understand where you are in this...the love/hate/want to wound him/want to show him how strong I am without him/want him to miss me/want him no where near me etc, mood swings are awful. Getting out of bed...nearly impossible, and had I not a dog that HAD to go outside, I probably would have spent days, if not weeks in bed.

I get the dishes situation...I still get like that sometimes, so I take it a bit...like...if I can wash the bowls, that's good enough, or the utensils...something I might actually use. Everything else can wait.

I wish I could offer more help, but I want at least for you to know, you're not alone in this...pm me anytime if you'd like. Venting is totally allowed, and understood.

Believe it or not, and even if it doesn't feel like this, it means you're healing. (((hugs)))