I know what you mean about being scared of getting well. Meds have been helping me a lot, but a part of me keeps wanting to go off of them -it's the stubborn part of me that wants to surf through life solo, without chemical assistance or a label of being 'mentally ill'... but on the other hand, I am starting to realize what it's like to actually start living again - I barely remember Nov. to Feb. - it's all a haze because I was so down. Meds are keeping me somewhat stable right now, and I too was a bit scared, but it is nice to start feeling better... it is nice to actually start coping better... One tiny step forward is my motto now...