I began therapy in July because I felt like I needed help ending communication with my mom as well as anxiety issues. Now here I sit neck deep in transference(shocker, right?). My mom was cold, distant, unapproachable and abandoned me repeatedly. She also did not give or allow nurturing touch. The therapeutic relationship is so painful because it reminds me so much of the relationship with my mom. I'm not saying she is like my mom----thankfully she is the opposite but the boundaries of the therapeutic relationship is and that makes my heart hurt. My therapist is wonderful. She is consistent, caring, and a good listener. She also allows hugs and texts/emails in between sessions(2 things that really mean a lot to me). When I was growing up, I longed for and needed love from my mother but all I got was a "tease" of it. In therapy, I see her once a week for an hour and again it just feels like a "tease" of what I need. It is like therapy has awoken a sleeping giant of my unmet needs. As much as I want to put her in my pocket and have her "be there" for me all the time, she can't and won't be. I am insightful and know why this is happening but that doesn't make it any less painful. Why put myself through this? This has become 10x more painful than the original reasons why I started therapy 10 months ago. Therapy in itself makes me feel the intense feeling of "wanting so badly what I never got while growing up". My therapist can fulfill some of those needs but not the big ones. I just think I rather bury those wounds back up instead of having them exposed wide open week after week. Here is my question: knowing all this...... Do you think it is best to end therapy if transference is causing you so much pain? Would you (even when you are very attached to your therapist)?