Quote:
Originally Posted by learningtolive2013
UGHHH. So I made a decision to move out of town "tomorrow I'm leaving".. Why am I having second thoughts? I hate this merry go round of emotions/feelings.. I'll get excited to go, thinking of all the new opportunities that await me and my son and then I get these second thoughts of "am I making the best decision", "what if", "i know i don't want to stay here but am i going to the best alternative", etc..
Why can't I just make a decision, stick with it and feel good about it? I think a driving factor in my feelings is that I've had issues staying with my sister before and I'm scared it will be another bad environment "not as bad as here" but still not "the best".. UGHHHHH.. Damn you BPD..
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I know the second thoughts are debilitating and wear on your resolve, but just try to think, when they happen, that it IS the BPD, not actual second thoughts. Another way I try to stop them, is I make an actual list of the pros and cons of any big decision (seems any decision is dangerous but the big ones are traumatic) and once I've done that, and am satisfied I've thought of everything possible that would be a 'con' and I still want to do it because there are more 'pros'...I refer back to the list EVERY TIME I have a negative or second thought.
Just to reasure myself it is only the BPD messing with my head. It works for me so I hope it works for you.
Good luck on your move and take care
