Hi Nolafeline. I am so sorry for what you are going thru. Its so hard because friends in the real world just don't understand depression. My friends think I should be able to just "pep talk" myself into a better mood. I have even been told I have a bad attitude. Believe me, I wish I could just "pep talk" myself into a better mood. I now try to avoid discussing my depression with people around me because they don't understand and I think they have labeled me as "crazy". It seems like medicines help just so much. I wish I had some good advice for you, but I will say this, you are not alone. I understand what you are going thru. Keep posting here. There are lots of people on this forum who will love you and support you. Please hang in there and God bless. Feel free to message me anytime.