I really understand what you are feeling. When I was first diagnosed it was depression and anxiety/panic disorder. I feel completely hopeless, helpless, unable to sleep, unable to eat, unable to concentrate, ...

I had gallstones, which I am told is more painful than childbirth. I told my tdoc I would rather go through that pain again than the pain I feel from my depression and anxiety. I think what makes it so tough is you can't point to a place and say it hurts here, you can't have surgery to remove it and it can take several starts and stops, and combinations of medications to find the right medication and then there is the wait for that medication to take effect. I started to cut believing that if I bled the pain would bleed out of me. Obviously, it didn't.

When I was first diagnosed I was traveling a lot for business. It got so bad I lost it one day at work and ended up taking a leave of absence. Fortunately I was in the office that day. When I returned I asked my pdoc to put me on a no overnight travel restriction because I was so fearful of having an anxiety/panic attack while away from home. It wasn't that I didn't have attacks while at home, but I at least knew my surroundings and that did give me some comfort versus being alone in a hotel room.

I later learned some techniques to help. Here are a few I've used - all include closing my eyes.

* Close your eyes, picture your perfect place and just breathe. My perfect place is standing on a beach on a warm summer morning. I feel the warmth of a slight breeze as I watch the sunrise, and I feel light - my mental health intact. And I just breathe fresh air.

* With your eyes closed, count up to and down from 100 using different numbers.

* With my eyes closed I picture a flickering candle flame as I work to control my breath. There are phone apps for candle flames and fireplaces.

* Can you have a conversation with your friend who's driving about something you enjoy?

When worse comes to worse, I have Xanax that I take regularly, but can also take on an as needed basis every 4 hours.

There is a therapy - Dialectical Behavioral Therapy - that teaches you how to manage these times. You can get the workbook online and/or find a group that focuses on this therapy. I found it to be very helpful.

Good luck.