My father was a sociopath. Until he died, I thought my Mom was perfect. The day after we buried him she became him. She betrayed me and came very close to destroying me. She took away the person I loved most in the world, and that time is gone and I can never, ever go back and fix it. She let me be homeless and for three years I didn't speak to her. Slowly, ever so slowly I built a relationship back because I wanted to be the better person and have no regrets when she eventually passed.

Now she is a shell of her old self. What do you do with those old feelings of betrayal and pain when you're looking at someone who is tiny, confused and afraid? I love my Mom and would never allow anyone to hurt her. They'd have to come through me to get to her. Yet, I know I can't trust her. At least I couldn't trust the old Mom. She put on such an act of piety that everyone thought she was a walking epitomy of an angel. I knew the truth but no one would believe the ungrateful daughter she made me out to be.

What in the world do I do now? Nothing is the same. How am I supposed to feel?

Jan