"Though i dont think of my mother like that, the idea of a older woman mothering me up, giving me bath, ..and initiating me..has been my..fantasy....I would like to snap away..and dream about woman of my age.
Are there any ways out of these kinds of obsessions?"

I am a Mom over 40 who found that my curiosity with other women besides myself was really due to a lack of female friendships. Maybe what you think is sexual is actually a desire for acceptance, understanding, or a healthy relationship with women and/or your Mother. I have not figured out how to have healthy female friendships in my life, but I am so happy to have understood what I am really feeling and why. Every fascination has a root cause. It simply presents itself in a different form that may not be so obvious. If you are satisfied with yourself in other areas of your life you may feel more secure altogether and less in need of the comfort of a Mother person.

As a woman and Mom over 40, I can say that after more than one divorce, family illness, and having a teen daughter survive Ovarian Cancer, the last thing I want in a relationship is to have to mother a man who is not self-sufficient and emotionally secure within reason. But that said, I wish you support and growth in your journey to understand yourself. Have you tried dating women your own age?? Maybe the experience would give you another point of view to consider??