Hi. Wow, thats a lot of complicated back and forth. My t gave me a transitional object - a coffee cup - before he went on business trip. I wasnt expected to return it when he returned - he made it clear it was mine - but in the weeks that followed, i still developed a very strong feeling that it wasnt mine to keep, that i would have to give it back. I eventually realized that feeling corresponded with idk the conditional "love" in our family? Anything i had, wasnt mine to keep - my mother wouldnt even give me and my brother our college diplomas. It wasnt a matter of politely asking us to order her a second copy - the originals were not leaving the house; she paid for them. our accomplishment was discounted, i felt.

Anyway, i would be slightly annoyed at your t for making this so complicated! It literally took weeks for my feeling to develop, and i saw it like a lake. This procedure of yours is like hopping on and off a bus. Is it yours or isnt it? That is too huge a question to ask about a transitional object. Well for me, anyway. Or Is it trivializing? Thats what is confounding to me.