needarealitycheck, does this mean you are not on any meds right now? Please remember that when it comes to finding the right antidepressant, it can take a while, and a good amount of trial and error. Do not give up on medication because you had problems with Cipralex- go back to your doctor and get reassessed.

You sound like you are being very hard on yourself- I have been as depressed as you are now and it is easy to get down on yourself even more when you feel like you are not keeping up with life. At times like that I try to keep everything as simple as possible, just the most basic of basics. Food (I did a lot of convenience/takeout when at my worst), clothing, shelter. I break things down into the most minuscule of tasks, and try to be as gentle and forgiving of myself as possible.

Hugs to you