How often do you contact her when you are upset outside of session? Seems like you rarely do, but you have spoken to her by phone a few times and she was helpful if I remember right. And she definitely seems to be there for you during session.

What do you think you are "agreeing" to? You didn't mention her putting you on a contract or plan or anything that you had to "agree" to. Slow down Granite. You are causing yourself to spiral about something that I don't think even happened or is even a plan. Unless I'm missing something, you are creating this scenario in your head based off of something you scared yourself with on the internet. Slow down. Back up.