I have been dating a guy for a little over a year. We had a great time for the first few months, although he is very independent, never married, no kids and such....it seemed he was interested in my life, my kids, etc. He was taking care of his mother, or at least watching over her, at this time. 3 months later, she is diagnosed with terminal cancer. 3 months after that she passed. He took complete care of her and of course, although it was hard for me, I tried to not let my needs overpower that need.

After her passing he was of course different and depressed. He basically was never there for me and constantly letting me down. Over and over. I walked away 3 times but couldn't let go and went back.

Now I have fallen into a depression (I'm Bipolar II) mixed weird sort of funk for like 3 months now. I think I can attribute a lot of it to just feeling unlovable because I've been chasing this unavailable man for so long. I want to let go but can't seem to.

Who else does this resonate with. What is your advice. I'm starting with a new therapist tomorrow and I have high hopes for her, but my life is basically in shambles right now from my instability and my complete lack of want to do much of anything. Motivation, pleasure, cognition, energy, etc are all absent and I just feel worthless sometimes.