Meeting with a new therapist tomorrow. I have high hopes that she and I will connect. The one I met with last week definitely didn't and she couldn't get me in for 3 more weeks because she is so "booked". I'm tired of feeling flat, emotionless and unmotivated. Hoping my new meds kick in soon and lift me up a bit.

Been questioning how much of our mood fluctuations we influence, as opposed to what we can influence with meds. I'm so confused on this and just want to feel like life is worth it again. Right now I'm saying **** it all the time because it just keeps coming back to this **** feeling that makes me basically a fragment of what I consider myself.

So yeah... I'm over it.