Hello, this thread is the reason I made an account of here and will probably be a very long post . I feel very lucky for everything that I have been given and the opportunities I've seen. I feel like I am not living up to my potential as a person in multiple ways. It somewhat feels like the chicken and the egg, is depression causing this or am I becoming depressed based on my actions. (Mind you I haven't done much research on depression, and why haven't I )

I am currently in college and I feel like I am not making the most of it. I work hard at school, at least that's what I have been telling myself, and yet I don't feel like my grades nor feeling reflect the work that I have put it. I take time to study, take time to do my homework and after everything is handed back I feel down and know that I could of put in more effort. I am also not taking full advantage of the social aspect. I am a very shy individual and have a hard time meeting people. Everyone I see has friends around them, something to do over the weekend, girlfriend, etc. but not me. It seems like I can use this as an escape goat to not putting more effort into my school work because I am thinking of this yet I know I shouldn't bed.

Well this is a decent start of my long rant , hopefully this has made some sense and maybe some advice can be given Hopefully I am using this forum as intended and please let me know if I haven't