I don't have your experiences but I have a very good general method of dealing with issues paradoxically.

To apply, the general method, we need to generalize your problem. We will drop the sexual spexifics and just talk about thoughts. You do not like your thouhts. Thinking these thoughts does not make you feel good. So, you try not to think these thoughts. The prohibition makes these thoughts only more attractive, so you think them more, feel guiltier, commit to a more stringent abstinence, which, in turn, perpetuates the downward spiral.

So the prohibition did not work for you. Try its opposite - try to think these thoughts more and more... until you become bored.