I can't honestly say I know allot about this sort of thing. I guess I'm ruled by emotions allot too. But I'm not in an abusive relationship. I think that realizing you're ruled by your emotions is a huge step in the right direction toward self-knowledge. Whether or not you need to become harder & more logical is another question. The thing is though that this sort of transformation is a gradual process... one that can take time. In the meantime, you're in a potentially dangerous relationship it sounds like. What I think you probably need now is the support to make the choices you need to make. Is there some type of support group or women's advocacy organization where you could find the support you need? Going it alone in this type of situation is difficult regardless of how emotional or logical you are.