I went into crisis (aka couldn't function anymore, stopped working, started having the worst mood issues of my life) 8 months back. I haven't been stable since! Some of it can be attributed to the different med combos the dr has tried out on me, some of it is just me. I've been mixed, depressed, had akathisia, anhedonia, depersonalization, crippling anxiety, too much or too little sleep and appetite... and I don't even know how to describe some of it. But the bottom line is I get used to my circumstances, and then they change! The drugs keep not working out. The dr is strongly suggesting ECT at this point, which terrifies me. I'm already struggling with cognitive and memory issues, for one thing...

Am I alone in this? Has anyone else been all over the map suddenly like this when their moods normally change more slowly? If this simply is the illness getting worse with age, I really am afraid for my future!

My current med combo seemed to be working at first, and I made the mistake of being hopeful. Ugh.