What's your T's training and experience with trauma treatment? If you've struggled with SI and gestures, and he's known this, then his handling of your treatment sounds quite inappropriate to me.

You need to share with him what happens to you when you re-experience those feelings: do you dissociate? Go silent? Shake? He needs to be able to read your signs in the moment.

There are a number of approaches to trauma treatment, but if he's encouraging you to re-experience traumatic feelings, then he's got to build in safeguards. It is irresponsible to not do so. It also needs to be assessed whether you can pursue such work safely in an out patient setting. His suggestion that you stop therapy with him makes me wonder if he's thinking you may need more containment than he can provide in order to do the work, or questioning his own ability to conduct the therapy. Either way, you need to know.