Several times I've brought coffee or small amounts of food for my T, but it's rare. It can be tricky if you don't know your T's tastes. I brought a latte once, which he politely drank, then found out months later he only likes black coffee. Brought in a cake pop from Starbucks once, then found out later he rarely eats sweets. But he was nice about accepting my bribes ... er, gifts ... and never said anything.

But I agree with your wife about the food thing. T even says that "breaking bread" together helps create intimacy. So it might help with Madame T to ply her with foodstuffs in the hopes of softening her up. Hope it works!