Hello dlilemma-girl, and welcome to Psych Central!

Dear one, I am going to be very honest with you, and you will not likely like what I say. But here goes: This guy does NOT love you, but he is using you. And he is abusing you by the way he is treating you. No decent man would do the things he is doing to you. He is the one who is treating you like a "bad" woman.

We all make mistakes, and you did love the guy you gave your virginity to. You deserve a man who will love you regardless and never bring it up to you. God will forgive you.

No, you should not be punished this way. And, no, your life should not be like this.

Please, please leave him and find someone else. He will not want to let you go--understandably--and it might be hard to break up with him if you work together, but please do it. If need be, then find another job.

Let's see what other people have to say, too.