The only time I didn't appreciate a surprize smack on the lips was from a so called friend who had assured me (for months) he's not attracted to me and that we were just going to hangout.

I felt ambushed and betrayed, because he lied, and he also knew I have a bf AND knows my bf too. So just... NO.

To his credit he did apologize for overstepping that boundary and we don't stay in contact anymore. I felt bad for pushing him away (I've never had to do that before) but he clearly didn't want a platonic friendship like he lead me to believe, so its best we parted ways.

I say read the room, if the setting and the mood is right, a kiss could be a beautiful thing.

I would be weirded the fruck out if someone asked me if they could kiss me, I had no idea people even ask that, I thought that's what body language, sexual tension, chemistry etc is for... lol

Like what if I've never even thought about it?
Then I would be forced to weigh the pros and cons in a split second and make a possibly irreversable decision in that time.

If I say no, it could lead to a missed opportunity and a hurt friend, if I say yes, the friend could get their hopes up for something more as with both scenarios I've had time to think which means my response seems "final" in a sense and impacts my friend longterm... etc

IMO, sometimes overthinking just kills the buzz, whereas a "go with the flow" technique would produce a more natural response for both parties.

Years ago (in HS) I kissed a shy guy once, we were friends, tension had been building for quite a while and both of us had joked around about getting together. Shy guy was playing piano, I was singing along, and the tension in the room was electrifying... I wanted to scream "kiss me dammit I know you want to!" So I thought, what the heck I may as well

We had a fling for a few months, it was beautiful, nothing serious or sexual, but fun nontheless and he admitted that had I not ambushed him while he was playing the piano, he may have never gotten the courage to kiss me, so he was glad I did.