I'm sorry you feel so bad. Please get help for your sleep problem. I used to have weeks where i couldn't sleep, until i found out i had sleep apnea, i sleep with a machine now and the results are tremendous. I used to get little REM sleep, which we need for our bodies to heal everyday. in the last test i took i recorded no REM sleep so the prescription was raised from 6 to 10 on the machine. It really does help but i don't want to diagnosis anything for you but you should get a sleep apnea test done, if you have insurance or money to pay for it. Please don't hurt yourself, you probably feel and think that way because you're sleep deprived.