Well, I just found this site while looking up painless ways to commit suicide, and thought, what the hell, I have nothing else to turn to. Here's my dilema....... When I was 15 I found out that I have an extreme case of something called PCOS, or poly cystic ovarian syndrome. This genetic disorder comes from having too many male hormones in the female body, making it extrordinarily hard to get pregnant, and will make you fat, hairy, and otherwise not girlie. I have been shaving my face since I was 14, and I have gotten used to it, although it is very embarassing. It causes my extremely low self esteem, and makes it very hard to find a man. Now I am 21, should be in the prime of my life...... but I feel like I am dying of lonliness on a daily basis. I live with my best friend and her boy friend. Everyday, I do everything that she is too lazy to do, and in turn, she yells and screams at me, then gives him all her energy and attention. I am obviously bottom of the totem pole. So then, behind our house, lives our other best friend and her boy friend. She may be nicer to me, but has no time for me because of her boyfriend. Now as you can plainly see, I am the odd man out at home. I have no single friends, because when I got married, my husband had no friends, so I made friends with a bunch of couples......then he ran out on me with a friend of mine 8 months ago. I've gotten over it, but still wonder why, since he didn't even have the decency to say good bye.
Then there's work........ my boss thinks I am cynical because I hate the fact I work with 2 couples, and she gives me a lot of grief, especially when she tells me I am a far cry from ever being her favorite. Everyone loves to tell me about their day, and whats going on in their life, they ask for my help, but they never want to listen or help in return. Everybody has forgotten me......I have no one to talk to, and all I want is either to get a great boy friend to share my life with, to care about and to be cared about in return, which is hard fr a shy quiet person like me........this being the first time I have talked in going on 3 months, or to die, because what's the point of living in my own personal lonely hell? If anybody has the answer, I'd be forever grateful. Otherwise, thanks just for listening......I really needed it.<font color="pink"> </font>