Hello Sunrise.
I am sorry you are struggling to this degree at this time. I hope you feel better soon. Journaling is very good for people that have a hard time expressing themselves. Then you can see for yourself what issues are the most important for you to bring up with your therapit. Chat is also good to help people to rehearse what they will say to a therapist, by talking to someone else about it first. Take care. Soidhonia